Bill James

The world's most famous baseball statistician, Bill James is responsible for an entire school of thought called Sabermetrics. A current employee of the World Champion Boston Red Sox, James was recently listed as one of Time's 100 most influential people in the world in 2006. His influence has recently begun to stretch past baseball as some call me the Bill James of slow pitch softball.

Brad Radke

Brad tragically lost his Florida home and most of his possessions and sports memorabilia to what can only be described as a “mold catastrophe”. However, what can never be lost is that although he was offered in approximately 189 trades during the season, the 9-game winner was the motivational anchor of the Mordecai3FingerBrown pitching staff and helped lead the way to their first Fantasy Baseball championship in 2005.

Chase Utley

I've been mad at Chase ever since he hit a save-blowing home run off Papelbon on June 26, 2006. But how can you stay mad at a guy who posts his workout videos on his website? I know I can't.

Don Orsillo

The voice of the Red Sox, Don was easily the most excited person I've ever seen when I asked to take a picture with him. My only gripe is that he doesn't understand it always takes two pitches to fall behind 0-2.

Rich Harden

Harden possesses one of baseball's most electric fastballs to complement an absolutely devastating splitter. He's also a bitch.

Apr 8 Harden will miss his scheduled start on Tuesday due to a strained lat muscle, the San Francisco Chronicle reports.

Billy Mueller

Some call him a modern day warrior...others, a consummate professional. Me? I think he's a mean mean guy.

Horace Grant

Horace Grant is remembered fondly for partnering with Scottie Pippen to win back-to-back-to-back NBA championships and for their role in NBA Jam. Most notable, however, were Grant's Rec Specs - of which Tony Domestico now has a pair.

Mike Tyson

At one point he was the most feared man ever to step inside the ring. These days, he just wants to eat your children.

Randy Moss

From his website:

"I want to take time out to thank all of the fans for their support and for wishing me well in my return to New England. I'm ready to get back. We have some unfinished business to take care of."

$27M + $12M guaranteed = Straight cash homie

Uncle Mike

Mike Lowell's resume is already impressive: 4x All Star, 2x World Series champion, 1x World Series MVP, the best all-time fielding percentage for third baseman. But now he has something even more prestigious to add to his trophy case - the Golden Paddle. When reached for comment Lowell had this to say,

"Bring on Shennett!"

Jacoby Ellsbury

As baseball season nears it seems appropriate to honor some of our favorite up & coming players. Today, Jacoby Ellsbury. Yeah I'm a founding member of the facebook group

Future Mrs. Jacoby Ellsbury Fan Club...deal with it.

Mose Schrute

Mose, cousin of Dwight Schrute, is well known for his family beet farm and competitive table tennis skills. A lesser known fact, however, is that Mose writes for FireJoeMorgan.com under the pseudonym Ken Tremendous.

Young Guns

Since we could all use a pick-me-up today, let's think back to summer - hot dogs at Casey's, beers at T.G.I.'s, and, most importantly, the best softball team in the MetroWest area. Come on now, kid!

Junior Seau

"...and now we'll try to become a part of...ever."

-Junior Seau

Pete from Toronto

Q: I'm 6-foot-5, 250 pounds, and not even close to being gay, so you know the Pats are good when people don't even look at me funny when I mention my man-crush on Tom Brady. Mostly, they nod in agreement. I think at least 60 percent of North American males must have a man-crush on Tom Brady at this point, whether they admit it or not. Think about it. You're out at a bar one night with more than a few cocktails in you, and there's Tom Brady, you get to talking, go out on the dance floor, and eventually you're back at the booth and he leans in and tilts his head just a little. Who's turning that down?
-- Pete, Toronto

Brian Collins

I'm so sorry...

John Buccigross

Tom Brady (Again)

26-28. 262 yards. 3 TD. Who is this guy?

Tom Brady

Simply put, Tom Brady is a god among men. In all likelihood he had sex with at least 10 women without ejaculating - there's no other way to explain his godliness.

David Ortiz

BumbleBtna: What's my pet monkey's name?
SmarterChild: David Ortiz.